Sickk and Tiredd... (ughh Eff thiss)

LITERALLY!

Im on the computer bloggin tired of typos on my crackberry but its ohkayy. But I am so sick and tired of being sick and tired. Im tired of lookin at my phone expecting a phone call and not getting it. Im tired of someone getting madd at me for not calling them when they ass be at work. (rolls my eyes on that one) reminds me of my ex yo, seriously. Chill the fck out.

Im sick and tired of throwing up at 3 am every damn morning and coughing for like 10 more hours after. Im tired of being sick and im sick of being tired. Im tired of sleeping, i wanna eat something.

FAYETTEVILLE STATE UNIVERSITY's infirmary is finna make me madd. They always changing doctors they need to get there shit together, i cant just show up and get turned down cuz of no doctor being there for me to get some medicine. I dont care if there is a nurse there, she should know what kind of cough medicine i need to get some fckn sleep and to stop fckn coughing. Giving me these Chloraseptic shit.

*by the way i had a MAJOR blonde moment. lmao i felt like a dumbass wen i left the infirmary. a TRUE dumbass. lmao. Never a dull moment with me.*

Anyways;; MASSIVE HEADACHE. im finna spit this out drink the rest of my koolaid and take this benadryl *i dnt got no dmn allergies* and see if it will put me to sleep. Stories i heard, they shud do the trick.

Im tired of my mom acting bitchy at me. Shit, be happy i got a boyfriend and not a girlfriend that u swore up and down ima end up having.

IM SICK OF "CAP DUDE" CONSTANTLY TEXTING ME A BUNCH OF BULLSHIT AFTER I TOLD HIM TO LEAVE ME THE FCK ALONE ALREADY! niggas i will never understand.

Oh by the way,

Did I mention im sick of coughing????
Life Sucks. FML FML FML FML FML. I havent tlkd to my boyfriend since i left from there. Makin me madd. I need to stop reading his text messages they be making me madd especially since i cnt read his sent messages and the fact that he is "scared" of my mom cuz she told him... lmao thru my voicemail she will kick his ass if she see him. lmao.

That was funny.

Ughh..

I need a doctor, anyone know a good way to get rid of a cough, i got a speech due *which i know ima fail at* and i cnt cough and speak at the same time i done lost my voice like, a million times already cnt lose it anymore.

Haterssssss

What are haters exactly???

In my opinion, haters are people that try to bring you down or people that are jealous of you basically.

I never thought I would have a hater so close to me. Ya digg but things change I guess. I don't care if people call me ugly or anything to try to make me feel badd. Pshht;; I got a man what about you???

Then I can careless what you gotta say about me and my boyfriend. My mom is def a hater on that one. Talkin shit and haven't even met him yet. Lol.

Then my roommate be tlkn shit when he buys me things. Lol. Like, seriously. Yea he bought me a necklace and she gonna tell me its ugly. Werd; I like it though. So, pshht.

Well, I finally seen my bf after 2 weeks, that nigga was trippin hard like, wooow. Then takes his anger out on me. Men but he was happy wen I cam down there like realllly happy.

I luv him tho.
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&& it keeps getting harder

Ohkayy, this is one of the reasons why i wished Charles had a car. But its ok.

His best friend got in a car accident and totalled his car so now I cant ride with him, and I liked riding with him because it was smooth and comfortable and he was cool like, realllll cool. Lol. He was funny to but still. I still got to ride with my babe.

But then, he told me bout his other homeboy going to jail because of "..........................." and I was like wooooow. Like, damn. Nigga gonna be in there for a while. Just, wow. He aint gettin out no time soon unless he lucky and has a good lawyer. Well, he was one of the places we can stay at cuz we aint stayin at his moms (nun wrong with it. I jux want him to be in the same bed as me. not me in his bed and him on his couch lol.) So, now that he did that stunt. I dont even know if we can even stay there.

Then just now I found out his mom (2nd, 3rd, i lost count) done got the car taken cuz they wanted it back like, seriously what the hell is going on. Are they trying to keep me from seeing my future babe. Like, seriously. We are already talking about the whole me going to Winston Salem issue, now this. I mean, I could stay there wenever i wanted to with no problem but its the fact that i wont have a way home. Im not able to drive down there my mom wudd kickkk my ass. She already done cussed me out over her car going down there.

*thank god she aint find out about the speeding ticket Joy got in her car*

and then he said that his homeboy Stokes gets out of Jail soon but idk if that nigga has a car or not and it would be reallllllll awkward meeting him. I think I would have to like, back off from him because of him just getting out, him and charles might need some time to hang out and catch up even tho they visit him and jail a lot but still. A lot of shits been happening lately this month, and I dont want us to end up breaking up cuz of lackk of contact of seeing each other cuz trust me, shit i went thru wit Stacy wen it came to that, I can wait. As long as when I see him, is welllll worth the wait.

*not this time cuz my..... yea and then his cousin..... mmmm yea. like i said not this time but soon enough.*

I can just feel his hugs now and his hair and, ... ughh pisses me off wont send me no pics of his hair. Ima be sooo mad if the lady dreaded his hair and its ugly like i would freak out and jux.... ugh. but i dont care. its how he likes it, as long as he dont look like rick james cuz this nigga tlkn bout some of them hangin in the front of his head.

*shakes head and laughs*

UGHHHH! I cant wait.

J. Holiday's Fatal is playing.

Story of my life.

"Everyday ur gone.its killin me to be without u. Cant make it alone all cuz im missing u.

Its like i gotta hangover, I cant get you out of my head."

5 days down 4 more to go.

2 more days till my cellphone is off and 1 more till his is off. Which sucks cuz we havent talked at ALL today and it makes me mad and I told him that but he said he got a job down there so im like, ohkayy. Do your thing since you wont send me no pictures. I gotta see them when he comes back up here Sunday or Monday or..... I dont know when the next time Ima see him but he trying to pay his phone bill and I guess he says he is gonna attempt to pay mine. 60 dollars to his 109. Not bad huhh. lol. I love him. I felt like I did ever since I was all depressed when I told him about Mario. I wish I can take that back, that just ruined everything. Well, not really, it just shows how much he really cares for me.

He even said that he was in withdrawal from the whole week we been with each other to.... him being in texas and im here and he cnt see me till when he comes back. I miss him soooo much I dont know what I would do. Then I dont wanna worry him about a (PT) unless I kno for sure that i need a (PT). Lord please let it come on at the end of next week. I dont want it to start and me being with him. Thats, unfair. Totally unfair. *rolls eyes*

He told me that his friends and his family likes me. I mean, when I first seen them I was shy and stuff, it takes me a minute to get used to being with them you know but that whole week I was there I opened up more and actually started talking. I like them and he met my roommate Joy and homeboy Jamu'. Ughh this sucks. Im finna get in the shower and mope around on this dmn speech paper.

Im out.

(why my mom calling me asking me why i havent called her. I be busy. im sorry for being busy).

and he says i need to make my facebook statuses more about him but he aint updating his like that and im barely updating mine. lol. men.

I'm 19 not 12...

I don't understand parents... I really don't. I can't even go to my boyfriends house and chill without her freaking out about it. WELL GUESS WHAT! Oh the fckkk well. I'm going to become my rebellious and say fck her and the world because its pointless for ME to be on PUNISHMENT for going to chill with my BOYFRIEND!

*rolls eyes*

I am not 12. Do I look 12, no I don't. I don't even stay at the house. Then he wonders why I keep avoiding bringing him to meet my mom. I don't even know what she would do, she talking about killing him for deflowering me. Everyone, lets just laugh. I wanted to say something about that but I kept that comment to myself. (You dont have to worry about that nigga he in Jail now) Smfh.

I miss him. Today is now Day 4 of me not seeing him cuz of him being in texas and 3 more days till my cellphone is off.

*sighs*

No cell phone. Do anybody feel my pain??? Since I been disowned from my dad I can't even find 51 dollars to pay the bill.

*sighs even harder*

I'ma get my tung pierced. I'ma get my industrial done. I want to get a tattoo but *secretly* im scared to death of them.

But anywhoo... I had to vent out my anger.

Me and Charles

My boyfriend (proud to say it, best decision ever) gave me this bracelet. He told me it was his dads bracelet and he had it on his rearview and gave it to him before he went to jail. I guess when he said he was gonna give me something he really meant it.

He tuk it out his pocket and jux gave it to me expecting me to figure out how to put it on. Oh well I figured it out eventually. I spent all week except 1 day with him. All week and I loved it. I never felt this way before, he going to texas and its 17 hrs away and I'm going to miss him already.

Hell, its been since 12 since I last seen, touched, and kissed him. I was on the phone wit him and I miss him so much like its not funny.... Ughhhhhh!!!!!

I met his mom, his brothers, his sisters, his friends and his cousins. They are all cool and I like them a lot. A whole lot better than my family, they are more fun to hang out with than my boring family.

My mom done kicked me out the house cuz I decided to leave so I guess I can't have any fun during spring break but oh well spring break is over and I can care less about the trouble I'm in cuz I'm always in trouble for something stupid but that's parents for ya.

Parents jux dnt understand and then drama wit joy jay and christian becuz of the simple fact christian tryna act hardd and come at all three of us bitch we girls we do damage that's why we fckd ya shit up. Niggas lie on their dick like its the new fashion. Ill fck all the football players in that hall up aint nothin but a thangg bae.

Oh yea, did I tell u?

I miss my boyfriend.
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Extacy

It really is what they name it. Extacy. I took that thursday morning with Charles and his 2 friends like, weird. We was trying to figure out why it was taking forever for it to kick in, but when it did. It was the best ever.

Green grapes, we ate that bag up (most of it) and then wen we got to that house and got to that room. Ughh 3 full hrs nonstop mann. 3. Then still got home jux in time to go to school and take my midterm and yea... I was coming off that high. Dmn near killed myself I was so depressed. But I spent most of my week with him. I feel like I love him and then yea, I met his mom. She's nice but mean also so yea...

Then this morning took half of that pill and my hormones are allllll over the place like, ughhhh its drivin me nuts and I still feeeeeeel it.

Kids...
Dnt do drugs. Don't do them. Its sooo hard it feels like shit getting it out of ur system. *screams* well that's my week.
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....

I'm chubby as shit. Ughh. No sex appeal whatsoever.
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