Disrespected

I am not an aggressive girl especially towards men. I at least want to be the one being shown around I dnt want to show myself around. Mario had me feeling sooo ugly last night. I am with my bff, my ride or die Shieka, and we all talk and then suddenly this girl screams out RIO! And come to find out that's her ex. Think how awkward it is. Just think, to have him come from beside me to her just like that and not come baq to me till the time they left asking me if I feel ignored. I was gently pushed away by him and he gently moved himself away from me wen he seen her. Then my bff calls me tellin me that he didn't even "claim" me as his gf. I'm not going to be the one that goes up to him and has to TELL them I'm his girl, I just wish he would tell them I'm his girl and look unavailable. But nope, he looked available and was all over the place, without even asking if I was ohkayy.

Make sense??? Nope, cuz I'm still confused about it.

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Make up sex

So Charles was going thru my phone, looked at my facebook and saw Mario's pic and me wearing Mario's necklace. He said that I looked happy, its a pic, ur supposed to smile. I managed to not cry or mention the stress I was in. I forgot what made him realize to shut up about it. I just remember him teasing the shit out of me.

I did txt him that I was off and I even called him and let him know. He was teasing me hard, so when I told him that I was off (I said it at least twice) he rolled me over to the bottom and just started teasing me some more.

... It was better than inside the car. We went at least 6 times before he really wore his self out. I was loud, I kept grabbin the headboard making noises. It felt soo good and soo right but I feel like he busted in me twice. Pulling out kinda spilled, he said he had a condom but yet didn't use it. Then again I think he asked me if I wanted to be his baby, I said yea (sighs) and then... Mario came to mind.

I mean, like in my dreams. It fooled me though. I'm actually excited to see Mario tonight.

Charles told me I will always be his baby and he would always be there for me but... (That's where he stops ;;rollseyes). He talked about him so much I was willing to walk downstairs and go to sleep. He wants me to be with him Sunday to, ill have to see what's up.

I'm still confused. Even more confused than ever. Charles or Mario? Mario or Charles? (Sighs) man up shanae and try to do the best thing for u and ur heart.

(Sighs)


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Always something with cops

Come on fayetteville state u can do better than this. Lmao.
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Crazy forwards

You are on a crowded bus when you suddenly realize you need to fart. The music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat.You let go about 5 strong and loud ones back to back.After a couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach yourstop. As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and that's when you remember.

You've been listening to your iPod.
lol keep
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me wearing mario's chain he gave me to wear just for this week.
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I been playing one love and love lost over and over and over again. I really think charles wud be better but idk. He asked me to spend the nite with him friday. I told him ok. I'm kinda embarrassed. I snore hella loud, lol u kno wen u haven't slept u jux... Yea. Well, I guess its gonna be the first time I'm staying at a potential guy cousin house lol.

Anyway, my friend Tre told me that I should test them with the whole sex thing. I am, but not with charles. I mean, I had sex with charles, valentines day. But mario I haven't so ima see where that goes. Ima give it the next couple times before I officially make my decision, its like, I need to think straight or if charles is really serious bout not wanting to tlk to me. He did say that if I'm with him he dnt want to think about that. He asked me for his name and all of that. He even told me bout his sister braiding his hair and asking y his eyes were red.

Is it that serious to remind me of the hurt I put on u??? Is it? I wanna know.
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Finally

I figured out how to do mobile blogging. :D
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Advice is really needed...

"So many people never find the one

That's why I really wanna tell you sumn'

I really think this is it for me

I really think you're the one I need"

I know some of yall know my predicament.

Mario or Charles. My friend told me to make a list and I tried and that list went nowhere. Thanks for the advice on FB. I decided to go for Mario but Charles isnt having that. I dont want to stop talking to Charles. At all... i want charles but I want Mario more cuz I kno if my mom had to truly pick for me it would be Mario and ..... Mario seems like the right one right now.

I asked everyone what they thought and they all said Mario, but... I don't want to make a stupid decision and then when me and Mario dont work out. Charles would already be done with me. Its times like this, why i wish i never had a conscience.

My twin said that if he really wanted to be with me he would still stick around and wait for Mario to fuck up so.... ima just go with his instincts. If I lose Charles then I guess I lost one good guy and if I lose Mario, I lost both. The thing is, is that I barely even talk to Mario now. I want to be with someone I see constantly and not having to rely on something else or ... something has came up. Its so hard.

Dont know who to choose right now.
Well Blogger People's. Help me... if u can.

"You are all I need and I'll never let go"

Who do u want Shanae, stop being so choosy.

Well i really really really like this boy named Mario. We been talking since forever

and this boy named Charles, ugh. i like him but not as much as Rio.

They are both sooooo sexy and i jux love the way they tlk.

but Charles asked me to be his valentine and i had already said yea cuz Rio jux been... u kno. MIA for a min.

Dnt get me wrong, the only difference between them is that Rio is closer than Charles.
They both looove to joke around, Rio loves music though and Charles likes to smoke. A lot. I mean, Charles dnt smoke around me, Rio quit smoking. They both have 2 jobs, they both love to dance, they both LIKE ME. They both have a cute smile, smell good all of that. They both have money basically... ( not that i really care cuz i really dont. ]

They are sooooo sweet. Even though I been tellin Charles to buy me a bear for Valentines day but still hasnt done it. He has no car or license. he uses his homeboy car to get up here but in order for him to come i have to bring my homegirl and she doesnt like his homeboy. He NEVER calls me and he RARELY even texts me backk.

Rio can drive, he has his own car ( 2 ) as he says, he cares bout his lil nieces and nephews, he is a real sweetheart he woulda gave me his chain. He calls me and then jux sings in my ear the whole time like... ok. lmao. But he txts backk sometimes to. ( he said he gonna call me and i still have yet recieved a phone call. ]
But its like... Charles asked me to be his Valentines day and i said yea and then with me hanging out with Rio... I forgot i was dating Charles for a second until after Rio asked me out and my dumbass said yea. I kno who I want to be with, even though it makes no difference, its still going to be the same way, (except Rio and his homeboy taking me and my roommie out to eat ] and he like the only one thats done that for me. I aint never really have anything speciall with any guy anyway so .. idk. But i realllly want to actually be with Rio but i dnt kno how to tell Charles that i dnt want to be with him anymore, its only been......... 3 days.
How am i going to break up with him? we just started going out Valentines day. *sighs* Im suchh a fckk up. I finally get a good guy ( in some sort of way ] and this is what i do.

I hate being me.

im live ;; like a superbowl kickk-off

BAD GIRLS CLUB IS LIVE!

that shit is Crraziiieee. First Portia, then Flo ( it was time for her to go though. ] then Natalie. That , i dnt evn know what to say. Over a 45 dollar drinking ticket. They were all drunk but honestly. How u go from on the ground wrapping up legs then pulling hair??? lmao. females.

Ughh i cant want till next Tuesday. ANNIE GETS HIT BY KATE! I mean damn. There is never any piece, i wanna kno what Amber does. I see her bad girl in her now, this WEEK needs to go by FAST!

19;; Another year older

I know I know. Im a week later but who cares. I just want to tell you that ALL WEEK last week was the best birthday week I ever. EVER . hadd. I looove my mother, i really do. She took me out to eat on my birthday at Miyabi's.  You see that plate, thats alll of the food. THe rice was bigger but i ate half of that and was already fool.

Anyways, that day I was talking to my friend "at that time" Charles. He said he would come see me for my birthday. Disappointment, he didnt. It was like this for the REST Of the week but my mom took me out everyday. Thursday, didnt do nun but go to class. Friday, went to the mall and had a bussssyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy day but guess what. I seen Charles 7:00 am and he was looking soooooooooo sexie like ohemgee. I just love the way he talk. I know yall like, Charles was never mentioned in these blogs before, why now? lol cuz 1, i dnt mention allllll of the boys in my phone, to much shit to remember lmao. But we was supposed to get a hotel room but then guess what

SNOW! yes i said it. SNOW SNOW SNOW!!!

But i cant complain cuz Valentines day morning, he found a way to see me and I loved every minute we spent together, and I have a boyfriend now and Im excited but upset at the same time. I still like the Army guy, the airforce guy is upset with me and the singer guy (yes HE IS NEWW and sexyy reminds me of my ex mark but sexierrrrr ] likes me.

I kno to never fck in Walmart parking lot at 5 am anymore. Not comfortable and toooo many people showing up..

SN: If i was talking to someone else first, and u all of a sudden pop back into the picture, am i supposed to stop tlkn to the person i was tlkn to just to go back to talk to u and not be sure if we are even going to be talking for a long time?

i mean, this boy is madd cuz he says i ditched him for another nigga but NO. he stopped tlkn to me so i went my own way so 2 months later he madd cuz i have a bf and now tellin me i dnt care bout him. I give up with him. Not my problem.

formspring.me

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/pointblankk

formspring.me

Sneakers or sandals?

Anybody that knows me know I will choose sneakers over sandals anyday.

Any questions?

Left out to dry... SMH niggas or need i say, yungins.

Not editing due to laziness and lack of sleep lol.

Dont get me wrong, younger guys can fckk to ya kno I just dont like the whole point in playing around pissing me off on purpose I mean, if he wanted the same treatment backk, I would have been more than ready to but I dont care how small and weak this nigga look, the nigga got strong hands its ridiculous. I mean, he 18 now but when I met him he was 17. Still a tryna be hard guy but he aint hard cuz the nigga not even guts enough to find someone else to take me backk... See what had happened was ....

SUPERBOWL 44

COLTS LOST! The Saints got helllla luckyy we coulda had it. ughh 2 fckn fumbles and a bad kickk... u fckn serious but congrats to the Saints on there first Superbowl win but where was Reggie's proposal. He's wackk (and sexy).. anywhoo and congrats to me for watching my first superbowl and football game ever. Now I need a fav team cuz NBA, i got the Nuggets and whateva Lebron James is on and A.I. hehehe.

NO MORE ADVENTURES;; wit yung guys

EVERYTHING WENT WRONG!

but one question, how do u blog on ya cell, becuz I really needed to spill my guts out wit this one at the moment it happened.

Expect something when I wake up cuz this ..... ughh.. no more yunger guys for me.

Love is not for everyone

I honestly think I should not have been born in the month of February aka the Love Month. I absolutely hate it. My birthday is in 6 days, and I will be 19. N-I-N-E-T-E-E-N. My phone company fuckin up on me and I had PLANS that I cant even make anymore and I hate it. Its pissin me off I can tell you that much.

Love isn't for me and I'm really in a pissy mood. I really hate being lied to and I hate the feeling of being played. I hate getting my hopes up for shit that I know won't ever happen anyway. I don't understand how everyone can wear their hearts on their sleeves, I can't even bring myself to really open up to anybody about my problems. It's MY problems, not YOURS so don't worry about trying to make me feel better. I can do that myself. Yea, Im lying. I just wish certain people would feel my pain and call me asking me whats wrong. I don't even get that. I get a "Oh, sorry to here that" and then it does nothing for me. I just feel like sinking to the floor and dying a slowww painful death and see who cares enough to save me from my agony.

But then again, its a bad day, everyone has these days but its been like this ALL WEEK! Im tired of being the messenger, I wish something good can happen on my birthday, every other time its nothing but bullshit and a waste of my time anyway, its not like anyone cares to make me happy on my day. I wont even get a call saying happy birthday, I wont get a text saying happy birthday (except from family but of course, its whateva] its just a "Hey Shanae, bye Shanae" and thats it. Nothing special. Nobody to come and hug me and give me something, no one to think about me. I don't even know who even thinks of me. This boy that I like, his name is Travon but I can tell you that he doesnt like me. I guess its cuz im like toooo shy and dont open up or i jux shut myself out and thats it. Im not going to open up to someone in a day, its no problem for me to do that. I'll talk but I just wont act alllll crazy and shit, i barely do that with my best friends now.

I just wanna know what people think of me.

( even though everyone thinks im Bi and Im a Total freak ] WHICH IM NOT BY THE ONE! IM NO WHERE NEAR A FREAK SO STOP ASKING ME! SHIT! Anywhoo. So yea, I like my friend Kayla. thats my best friend, we had that GF inside joke since 10th grade. HER AND RIKKI! So obviously if you don't like how we express our gayness then shut the fck up about it. ( No homo ] With this said. Im done.

PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT!!!!!

Feb 10, 2010 i will be 19 years old.

I hate it. Already.

-Point.Blankk

&& HERE WE GO AGAIN

BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH.

BITCH

I thought I made it clear that I am not willing to have sex with anyone. I really thought I made it clear but it seems to me that I didn't. I think I need to put NO on my forehead and every forbidden place. This guy is soooo annoying in sooooo many ways. I won't have sex with him and he always begs for me to have sex with him. Its not even a beg, its like a plea. A pathetic plea and I wish he would get over himself and stop claiming that he was the best I ever had (&&ofcoursethebiggest] LIES; ALL LIES! I am referring this to the (sexualharrassment] post. Yeapp, that same GUY! (rollseyesinannoyanceSMMFH!]

Of course me being me, I am pissedd off ready to leave but of course, the catch, I HAVE TO LEAVE by myself, I have to walk back to my dorm, BY MYSELF, i had to take the chances of getting caught, by myself. Actually, thats not a bad thing, i like thrills, more fun for me but.. i cant afford getting caught. I dont want to stay at my moms and be carless and no way to get to school and have fun.

His number is deleted off my phone, again. I say it all the time but im really fed up with guys saying they like me. I really dont care if you do (gojumpabridgetoproveyourloveforme] and I can careless if you think im the one. The thing i have with this is, I know its bullshit wen it comes out your mouth/txt/etc...

Its annoying for me to say that im on my (period] and im really not. Its annoying getting annoyed all the time. Welp, he jux earned a lifetimes worth of not talking to me anymore cuz I am transferring and since my mom has my money i cant put the money in the application, and i really need to but i feel like she used it for the heat bill, i knew she was going to do it. I need those 185 dollars, i had 340 left.